The Death Eaters Worst Punishment
by sabiangelrox
Summary: Voldemort is bored and punishes the Death Eaters with ballet classes! Warnings: complete OOC.
1. Chapter 1

The Death Eater's Worst Ever Punishment

**The Death Eaters Worst Ever Punishment**

A/N: I am not owner of these characters, tough I certainly wish I was lol!

Poor little Lord Voldy was bored. Very bored. And what more to entertain himself than punishing his favourite punishable "friends"…Lucius Malfoy, Narcissa Malfoy, Severus Snape, Bellatrix Lestrange, Crabbe and Goyle!

"I AM GOING TO PUNISH YOU!!" screamed Voldy.

"Why??" Asked all six death eaters in unison.

"DO I NEED A REASON FOR PUNISHING YOU?? NO!! I AM EVIL AND POWERFULL!!" he yelled at them.

"But I do have a reason…someone broke my mickey mouse pen last week!! Because of that you will all be punished! And the punishment is…..you will all go to ballet class!!" he finished laughing evilly. Everyone except Voldy gasped and dropped to their knees.

"Not ballet class!! Anything but that!" Sobbed Bellatrix.

"Do NOT interrupt me in the middle of my sentence!" snapped Voldy mercilessly.

"But you had already finished your sentence, My Lord" said Bellatrix astonished.

"Whatever. I have not finished. You will all go to the best academy in England! Oh and you will learn not only ballet. You will learn all kinds. Tango, jazz, belly dancing, etc, etc, etc" He said, holding up a leaflet. "And since it's very far away from here you will be staying at a hotel together. Paid by me."

Bellatrix screamed. "You mean I will have to live with _this_?! " she shrieked, pointing at Snape. Snape, who has a not-so-secret crush on Bellatrix, swiped down and kissed Voldy's feet.

"Thank you, My Lord! May I arrange the bedrooms?" he asked eagerly, looking slyly at Bellatrix. Voldemort sighed.

"No Severus. You may not. Each one will have their own bedroom."

"Oh. May it have a connecting bathroom, at least?" Voldemort gave this a thought.

"Hmm. All right".

"YES!!" shouted Snape, and went away jumping up and down like a maniac, singing "I'm too sexy for my shirt" Voldemort laughed cruelly. Bellatrix sobbed.

"Ah, shut up, woman. I have yet not forgiven you for scribbling on my Barbie notebook," he said coldly at her.

"My Lord, I – I – I – It wasn't me! It was – It was Crabbe!" she screamed pointing at him and looking at Voldemort beseechingly. Voldemort raised an eyebrow.

"Crabbe doesn't know how to _write, _you stupid woman"

And the scene ends here, with Bellatrix mumbling stupidly.

A/N: I know, short chapter. I'll make the next one longer, and funnier. Plz review! puppy dog eyes There's cookies! 


	2. BellyDancing

**Belly Dancing**

The six Death Eaters sat in the Malfoys' room (Voldemort had let them have the same bedroom, since they were married). It was certainly a gloomy scene. They were waiting for their first lesson, which would be belly dancing, much to their horror. In one hour they'd have to be there. Time went too fast for them. The time had come. They sighed, burst into fresh sobs and apparated to the street. Bellatrix knocked at the door. A pretty, young woman answered it.

"Hello" she said in a chirpy, Barbie – like voice. "I am Tiffany, your dancing teacher. Come in. Today is belly dancing!"  
"Duh" they all said under their breath.

They walked into the dance room. It was all pink. Bellatrix then began to scream in horror, running around in circles and screaming: ¡¡NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" maniacally. Tiffany tutted.

"No, Bellatrix. You are obviously a very stressed out woman. To dance you need to relax. Reeelaaaaaaaaaxxxx."

"Fuck relax! I cannot survive this torture!! I refuse to stand in a pink room!! LORD VOLDEMORT WILL KILL YOU!!" she threatened.

Voldy apparated into the room. "Actually, no, Belly. I had this room painted pink especially for you"

"Oh…It's LOVELY, My Lord." she gushed, but with a look of terror upon her face. Voldemort laughed maniacally and dissaparated. The dance teacher, even though she was a muggle, did not seem perturbed.

"O-M-G, did his plastic surgery go wrong?" she asked. Then without giving anyone time to answer (not that they would have, they were still gawping at the spot where Voldy had been) she gushed on.

"Well, it was lovely of him to stop by, anyway. Really, like, cute, don't you think? Let's begin!

The sight of Crabbe and Goyle trying to belly dance was painful to watch. Lucius considered cursing his eyes out, but then he realised it was his turn and contemplated just killing himself instead. Both he and Narcissa were reasonably good at it though. Bellatrix was appalling. The fact that she had gotten so furious she was completely rigid did NOT help.

Then it was Sevy's turn. Trying to stun Bellatrix with his wonderful (not!) "talent" he began to dance what looked exactly like Shakira to the tune of "Hips Don't Lie". At one point, he tossed his head so that his hair fell completely on his face…and _stayed _there.

"Really, Sevy" sighed Tiffany, as she watched Snape trying to unstick his greasy hair from his face. "Don't you know that you have to use a special Shampoo for greasy hair?"

"I do! Conditioner, also!" said Snape indignantly.

"You do rinse it all off, don't you, dearie?"

Silence.

"Ooops" He said, in a totally feminine voice.

"Oh, it's all right Sevy. We all make mistakes" said Tiffany soothingly - speaking as if he was five years old! The other Death Eaters chuckled and Bellatrix fell to the floor in hysterics.

"Now, now, don't let's be mean to Sevy. And before I forget everyone, we're all booked for a makeover! Isn't that so great?" Tiffany squealed. Narcissa, who is the cheerleader type Death Eater, squealed and clapped her hands. "Yayyy! Oh Tiff, you're, like, the greatest ever! Thanks sooo much!"

The others looked horror struck. Bellatrix, who was still on the floor, suddenly turned her laughter into hysterical sobs, as she pounded her fist on the floor.

"Nooo!! Noooooooooooo!! Anything but a makeover!! Anything!!"

"There, there now. The kind man that just disappeared had booked and paid for it! Isn't that nice of him!"

The answer from the Death Eaters (except for Narcissa, who was still squealing and singing a song that sounded horribly like "Happy Tree Friends") was an extremely loud: "NO!!"

**A/N**:_ Lol the thought of Snape belly dancing was, imo, hilarious!! I just HAD to put it in the story! Thanks for my sis, Ellenare, for beta editing. :) Please please please review! there's cookies and cakes and ice-cream! Puss-in-boots from Shrek adorable face_


	3. Chapter 3

Makeover madness

Makeover madness

The death eaters ad to prevent themselves hard from commiting suicide. IT WAS THE DAY FOR THE MAKEOVER! Bellatrix was sobbing and wailing. So was Snape, just to be on Bella's side. Lucius was staring daggers at his wife, who was squealing and clapping her hands exitedly. Crabbe and Goyle, who as always didn't have a clue about what was going on, were just staring in stupid puzzlement around.

They knocked on the door, and six assistants opened. They were ... well, they looked as if they would get on extremely well with Tiffany and Narcissa. As soon as they opened, they ushered them inside ... were Voldy was waiting, an evil grin spread across his face. Bellatrix screamed and went down to her knees, begging for mercy (so did Snapey, surprise, surprise) but cold, harsh Voldemort would not budge.

The assistants eyed them all. As they looked at them carefully, their expressions became more and more horrified. Except with Narcissa and Lucius, that both look quite attractive. Snape with his greasy hair. Bellartix with her frizzy hair and maniacal expression. Crabbe and Goyle with their ... everything. And then Voldy.

"Are you sure you wouldn't like to have a makeover too, sweetie? No offence, but you need one. We're experts, and you'd look extremely handsome when we've finished with you. You'll have all the girls rushing after you!!" they squealed.

Bellatrix glared. "My love – I mean, my Lord – I mean Lord Voldemort! - does not need a makeover, and I do NOT want girls running after him!"

"Really? Why not, sweetheart?" asked one of the assistants coyly.

"Because...because..." spluttered Bellatrix.

Narcissa squealed and started singing, inmediatly followed by others (except Bellatrix, Voldy and, of course, Sevy): "Voldy and Bella, sitting on a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G!!"

Sevy burst into tears. "NO! WHAT DOES HE HAVE THAT I HEAVN'T, BELLY??"

"What about "extreme power"?" answered Bella sarcastically. "And NEVER call me 'Belly'!!"

"I've got a nose!" said Sevy indingantly.

Voldemort sneered. "Well, your offer is very tempting, being made by such beautiful assistants..." Beallatrix glared. "...But I'm afraid that I have to move on. Work, you know...allways busy..." Bellatrix sighed with relief. "...Maybe some other time" Bellatrix looked horrified. With an evil laugh, he apparated. The sight of him dissapearing into thin air didn't affect the assinstants any more than Tiffany.

One of them went over to Snape and whispered: "You know, I'm sure if you let us do you a makeover Bella would really like you"

Snape's face lit up rather pathetically. "You think so?"

"Oh, yes. Why, she won't be able to take her hands of you" she gushed on.

Snape inmediately jumped on a chair and said "All right! Do your best!"

Bellatrix groaned.

_Ten miutes later:_

-Narcissa has curlers in her hair. Meanwhile, she's getting a manicure.

-Lucius is getting his eyebrows plucked. He is crying like a baby, begging for mercy.

-Bellatrix is disgruntudly watching as the assistant straightens her unmanagable frizzy hair.

-Crabbe and Goyle are getting haircuts.

-Assistant is washing Snape's VERY greasy hair.

_Half an Hour later:_

-Assistant is putting makeup on Narcissa. She is looking even more georgous than ever.

-Lucius is wailing – assistant is cutting his fingernails, and since he's so abnormally delicate, it's actually hurting his fingers – or maybe his pride.

-Bellatrix is wincing as they put fake tan on her.

-Crabbe and Goyle's haircut made them look even worse. Assistant is deperately trying to make it look better, while the other is desperately trying to cut their toe-nails...unsuccsesfully, as they have some magic will of their own and grow back as soon as she cuts them.

-Assistant is still washing Snape's VERY greasy hair.

_An hour later:_

-Narcissa is almost ready, she just needs a few more touches of makeup.

-Lucius's assistant is trying to cut Lucius's hair, but he is behaving in a very childish manner, screaming "not my beautiful hair! Please not my hair!"

-Bellatrix has lost her patience and is shouting at the assistants as they try to dye her hair blonde, which is something she utterly refuses to do.

-Assistant's have given up on Crabbe and Goyle, and content themselves by shaking their heads disgustedly at them.

-Yup, you got it – assistant is _still _washing Snape's VERY greasy hair!!

_Two hours later:_

-Narcissa is done and looking beautiful, with soft shiny curls, long pointy pink nails and makeup on. Plus she's the only one who's smiling radiantly.

-Lucius is done looking horrified but better looking, with shiny blonde hair and manicure and plucked eyebrows!

-Bellatrix is done, with straghit – not frizzy! - naturally brown hair (the assinstant decided it would be better not to dye it when Bellatrix thumped her), makeup and pointy red nails. She would look very beautiful if it wasn't for the scowl on her face.

-Crabbe and Goyle look, if possible, worse than when they came in.

-Guess what – Assistant is STILL washing Snape's VERY greasy hair!

_Fifteen minutes later_

-Narcissa (who's squealing), Lucius (who's still shuddering of the pain – both physicall and pride), Bellatrix (who's scowling and swearing very badly) and Crabbe and Goyle (who are still trying to figure out what just happened) are back at the hotel. All except...

-Snape, who's VERY greasy hair is STILL being washed!

Nightime

Someone they don't recognize is standing in a corner, his back facing them! ¿Who could is be?

"It's ME!" said Snape, turning round. The Death Eaters gasped. The grease had finally come off!

"Not bad, ¿huh?" said Snape.

"Not bad at all, Severus! Your hair has actually got some _movement_!" said Lucuis, amazed.

Bellatrix, astonished, whispered to Narcissa: "You know, he doesn't actually look repulsive now!" and inmediately regretted saying it, for Narcissa gave a sqeal and a look of glee and started singing: "Snapey and Belly, sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G!!"

Sanpe gave a shout of myrth. "Oh, Belly!"

"DON'T CALL ME BELLY!!" shrieked Bellatrix, threw cousions at Snape and Narcissa and chased after them until she got hold of them and – well, you wouldn't wanna know. Let's just say there was a very violent scene that night in the hotel.

A/N: I'm so glad people liked my story! Give me some ideas if you have any! Please review! Even to tell me that it was awful! There are cookies, cake, ice-cream, chocolate...whatever you want! puppy eyes Oh and I know the spelling isn't very good, I suck at ortography!


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